Well, I guess it's time to finish off. It has been a pleasure being a guest speaker on Lubab's blog. I will leave you with some final thoughts.
Do what makes you happy. My wife likes going to shul on Shabbos, so she does that. I stay at home and read. I walk over to shul after the davening. I stay for the kiddush, and talk to my neighbors who all know what gives, but don’t care.
I have four children who are married (happily, I hope) and successful in their professions. One of them is a scientist doing genetic research like The Candy Man. Some are more frum, some are less frum. But they are all frum to some degree. I can only hope that by the time their children are ready to get married Judaism will have moved to the middle-of-the-road. I hope no one will say "But look who their grandfather was!" as I have sometimes heard said about other people.
I am glad that all my grandchildren are Jewish. I believe very strongly in the Jewish People. Personally, I am very proud to be a Jew. We Jews add a great deal to humanity and civilization. The world would be at a great loss if not for the Jewish people. I am not talking about frum Jewish people, I am talking about any Jewish people who are not ashamed to be Jewish. Einstein never hid his Judaism and even had some sort of belief in a God.
My rebbeim in yeshiva always told me that the first question they ask you in heaven (what a ridiculous concept) is "Did you have a set time for learning?" If there is a God, I suspect that the first question he will ask me is “Avi, what do you think of the beautiful world that I created for you to enjoy?” I better have a good answer to that, because if I don’t, and there is a hell, that's where he is going to hurl me. If God went to the trouble of creating this beautiful world then I imagine he would want you to be happy on it.
The best advice I can give to you is live, love, get along with people, and follow your heart. That means that if you want to be frum, and that makes you happy, do it. Since many of you know who I am, I have included a picture of myself below. If anybody wants to talk to me, you can email me at: zerabbi@aol.com
Be happy, and make other people happy. God bless you all, or whatever powers there may be.
Avi
(right-to-left) Me, my wife, and my daughter. My son-in-law, and my three sons are camera shy. - Avi
20 comments:
I've really appreciated your thoughts here. Creating space for this kind of dialogue is one of the great blessings of blogging. Thanks for taking the time.
Just a little thought, I'm sure God will not only ask whether we've enjoyed his good creation, I'm sure he'll also ask what role we've played in redeeming its brokeness. Which, as far as I understand, is the logic undergirding Judaism. Not that you have to be religious to do it ...
Avi, this was very nice. But I have pointed out your shortsighteness many times before. It's not Judaism that has moved to the right. Nor does it need to move to the middle. It's only the Judaism that you are exposed to. You have been to Beth Sholom with me and it's quite a normal American crowd who happen to practice some type of orthodoxy. I hope sometime you can make to the friday night service at Temple Sinai which is Reform. They some have a spritually uplifting service with beautiful music.
What? Pink Shirt?
What a Sheigetz. ;)
BHB
Avi, I have really enjoyed your postings. I was brought up in a chabad family and married a lubavitcher girl, and over the past few years our religious conviction has dwindled to basically nothing. Part of me feels bad for 'dragging' my wife with me as she now is pretty much an atheist as well but doesnt mind the practices. My poor mother can't cope with the embarrasement. I had a conversation with her today about what my beliefs were
(she brought it up), and a classic line she said was - 'why do you need evidence, and why does the truth matter so much'.....
I think it is great that you are happily married with very different beliefs - at least in the world we come from that is rare. The honesty is refreshing.
Nice picture Avi. From your description if I would have seen you as too young in the picture then I would have said Avi faked everything. Well Avi with a nice smile like that I can't ever quarrel with you. I can argue over tea with you though. I'm not known for easily getting huffy so we can argue a lot. LOL
I think the first thing asked after 120 years is if you did business honestly. Learning is secondary to honesty.
"Anonymous said...
I think the first thing asked after 120 years is if you did business honestly. Learning is secondary to honesty."
If learning is for doing then it counts big time.
The best learning is from life. Rabbi Yochanan Ben Zakai stood up for any old man because he felt that just living so long provided knowledge. There's nothing like really having experienced something. A historian takes a back seat to that.
OH MAN
On the picture, I TOTALLY got confused on the "right to left" and read it the other way around
You can imagine me finally understanding why you went off the derech :P
Hi Avi, or should I say neighbor? I came across your posts following one blog to another and I was pleasantly surprised.
We've had some short discussions now and then about religion and god, but they've been too quick.
I really enjoyed reading your posts, your history, your feelings and most of all that you do not hide under a veil of anonymity. So many skeptic bloggers do and it bugs me to no end.
I truly admire the beautiful relationship you and Shelly have and anyone who has met you two together can see you've got it in an instant. I wish you both many more years of happiness and respect, because I really think that's what makes your relationship work (and mine too.) It's all about R_E_S_P_E_C_T.
Thanks for the pleasant surprise!
Hey all. Thanks for the very pleasant comments, I really do appreciate them. If anybody wants to talk to me, please feel free to e mail me. You will find that I am a very friendly guy.....Avi
Avi you're ok. I think you're philosophy is all wet but you're ok. Have a good Shabbos to you and your wonderful family.
CHANIEF. Thank you for telling me how brave I am by not hiding. Now show me how brave you are. Tell me who you are, please.....Avi
RABBAN GAMLIEL. You may well be right. Perhaps my philosophy is all wet. But remember learning is a lifetime process. I just hope that Hashem ( for loss of any other words ) gives me another 30 years to keep learning....Avi Oh yes and Shabbat Sholom to you also.
"RABBAN GAMLIEL. You may well be right. Perhaps my philosophy is all wet. But remember learning is a lifetime process. I just hope that Hashem ( for loss of any other words ) gives me another 30 years to keep learning....Avi Oh yes and Shabbat Sholom to you also."
It is a lifetime experience. Enjoy it and may Hashem give you more than 30 years. Did you know I emailed you several days ago because of you being a Chaim Berliner? In your day Chaim Berliners also that their Yeshiva was THE YESHIVAH?
Rabban Gamliel. Sorry I did not get your e mail please e mail me again. Chiam Berlin on Stone ave was indeed the yeshiva.
Okey dokey. I meant to write in your day Chaim Berliners also thought their Yeshiva was THE YESHIVA and other ones are just nice places to go but why would anyone want to go anywhere but to Chaim Berlin? Or were they more cosmopolitan about yeshivas?
Avi, Very interesting story. My only question I have is, Do you ever have periods of doubt when you say what if I'm wrong?
Avi, Very interesting story. My only question I have is, Do you ever have periods of doubt when you say what if I'm wrong?
By now never. It took me a long time to get to where I am. I think that I have figured things out pretty carefully. And even on the very remote chance that I am wrong so what ? People make mistakes all the time. What could Hashem say to me if it turns out that I am wrong? Sorry God this is what my mind tells me. In fact I would even hope that I was wrong. At least then I would know that there is something that awaits me instead of total oblivion.....Avi
Avi, oops. I did not intentionally hide my identity... I thought I was signed in using the identity that links to my blog, from which you would instantly know who I was considering there are photos of myself and my children on there. I'm your neighbor, down the road, I don't like to use my last name online because I am mildly paranoid. My husband has had some business dealings with your wife... ringing a bell yet? I'll send you an email.
avi, think that it great that u and your wife can co-exist with each others beliefs and still be happily married. i think that is what marriage should be.
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