A New Kind of Transgression

Another three day Yom Tov has come and gone so it can only mean it's time for another narcissistic confessional post about how I'm breaking Shabbos and shunning religion. Lets get started!

When I was interviewing for my first post-college job I asked friends to tell me what kind of questions I should expect. One of the questions I found intriguing was: "Is it ever OK to break the rules?" I like this question because you can apply it to your everyday life. While I was never asked this question in an interview I did formulate an answer: "It may be OK to break the rules when the letter of the rule conflicts with the spirit of the rule, and even then you should avoid breaking it if possible."

With regard to keeping Shabbos and Yom Tov I have lived by my answer until this past week. I have avoided breaking Shabbos except for situations where I felt allowing the status quo to persist would destroy the peace of the day. (See: End of Judgement Days for one example from my life). But last Thursday night (second night of Yom Tov) I crossed the line because of my wants, and not to maintain "the spirit of the law."

Quite simply, what is came down to was I wanted to check my email. I don't believe in god so I felt kind of silly not checking my mail on my phone (which I could do without anyone catching me). Interestingly, it took me about a half hour to finally pick the thing up and start pushing buttons. For the half hour I was partly debating reasons for why breaking halacha was a bad idea (Orthopraxy may have merit, once I start I won't ever stop, what if I get caught, etc. etc. etc.). But partly, I was hesitating because I had never done anything like it before. There was a definite mental hurdle to jump. You can imagine my frustration when I pushed the power button on the phone and found that its battery had drained over the first day of Yom Tov. Luckily, my laptop was in the next room.

As soon as I opened up my laptop I totally forgot about all the mental anguish I had about violating halacha. It just didn't matter. My nonchalance about using the computer makes me think my hesitation before picking up my phone stemmed from changing my behavior and not from any sort of guilt. In any event being on the computer was great. I checked my mail (no messages), and got caught up on the blogs. Pretty standard computer session. No big deal. What was a big deal however, was getting to follow Major League Baseball on Yom Tov. All my life Tishrei and the baseball pennant race/baseball playoffs have coincided. For the first time in my life I was actually able to watch the games I wanted to see when they were on. (It also helped to have a MLB.tv account). Baseball was amazing/heartbreaking last week and I actually got to enjoy it. I don't see how I could ever go back. This Yom Tov I'll be in the basement watching the Division Series.

I might actually dance this Simchas Torah!